Acceptance - 10

Text: Romans 12:9-21

Today we will close our study on Acceptance. I don’t know what God has for us in the future but will be in prayer as we put together a new study to follow this one. If you would join me in prayer to that regard I would be grateful.

For today, though, we’re going to get a final grasp on a concept that ties all this acceptance together. We’ve looked at when others don’t accept us, or when we don’t accept others. We’ve studied the beautiful love of God in His acceptance of us. We’ve looked at surrendering our desires and accepting God’s plan for our lives. But I believe the bottom line that would boost the effectiveness of all of these is accepting Him. Accepting God for Who He says He is, accepting what He wants to accomplish in our lives, and how He wants us to be used in His awe-inspiring plan. Accepting His character as Holy, complete, and our ultimate standard.

While there is no way we could really go in depth into this entire subject in a single post, or even in our entire lifetime, we’ll dig into it enough that we can apply the principles to our lives today, and build a foundation for the way we think and act.

DO: Begin in prayer. Ask God to clear your mind of anything that might be a distraction today, and that might persuade anything other than His precious Words to speak to your mind and heart right now.

In our text today we see some of the commands God gives us. I want you to look just past the command and into the character of the Holy God behind it.

Read Romans 12:9-21.

By looking at even just this small list, and realizing that God would never hold us to a standard that He Himself does not uphold… realizing that these give us a small picture of who God is and what He is like, does that sound like someone you would love to emulate? Love to follow? Even love to just be around? Of course it does.

DO: Write out a list of those commands, starting at verse 9 and going all the way through to verse 21. This may take a few minutes, but I’ll wait.

Did you pretty much write out the whole passage? I did.

It’s a tall order that’s for sure. And I bet, if you’re anything like me, some will come easier and some will be harder. But know that God has got them all down pat. In fact, He’s the basis for this kind of behavior. This kind of behavior would not even cross our minds on our own. Our sinful nature is wired opposite of His, and so we not only don’t exhibit this behavior naturally, we naturally reject it. We reject it because it’s in opposition to our nature. Following me?

But as a child of God, everything changes. We accept Him, because He accepted us just as we were. No cleaning up needed. No façade, no polish… not even makeup. Just us.

1 John 4:19 “We love him, because he first loved us.” KJV

Love here is from the word agapaō, meaning to welcome, to entertain, to be fond of, to love dearly.

Q: Which part of the meaning of agapaō touches you most deeply?

And that’s it. That’s the only thing we can claim- is His love. Ours is merely a response. And that’s all He asks. The rest – the list of instructions, and everything right would come as part of that response. Part of accepting His unspeakable gift.

2 Corinthians 9:15 “Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!” NASB

Indescribable here is from the Greek word anekdiēgētos, and it’s the only time we find it in the Bible. Its meanings are

Anekdiēgētos: unspeakable, indescribable

or the negative form of ekdiēgeomai: to narrate in full or wholly; to relate, tell, declare

In other words, there’s no way to fully relate it. No way to completely tell how great and awesome His gift is.

How then, do we even begin to accept it?

Doesn’t God just blow you away?

And that’s what faith is. Accepting without fully seeing. Without fully knowing. One day, sisters, we will know, see and understand Him. One day, but not this side of Heaven. But aren’t we grateful? Here’s why this makes me grateful. Because to fully know and understand Him it would be easier to put myself in a position I do not belong. I belong in the finite. I belong where I don’t understand. This keeps me humble.

Romans 12:16 “Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation.” NASB

John 13:7 “Jesus said to him, you do not understand now what I am doing, but you will understand later on.” AMP

Romans 11:33 “Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways!” NASB

Job 9:10 “Who does great things, unfathomable, and wondrous works without number.” NASB

So, accepting Him isn’t some lofty, unreachable aspiration. It is a humble one. To humbly just accept. Ungrasp your stubborn fist, and open your hand to accept.

Acceptance – 9

Text: Romans 12:1-21, Job 12:9-16

Look at her. She’s got life all figured out, and everything is going right. She’s got a family, a thriving business and a large ministry and it’s all perfect. Why can’t that be me?

Have you thought those things before? I certainly have. Sometimes it’s a daily struggle. I would guess that’s a pretty normal thought process for most of us. But I’d like to ask you, along with me, to shift your focus.

That’s her. That’s not you.

We saw last session how God has a specific plan for you. You. And He’s guiding you through your story. Yours, not hers. Not anyone else’s.

If you haven’t yet today, please read our text from Romans, especially Romans 12:3-7, our text from Job – all eight verses.

We’ll talk about the Job passage first.

Q: According to verses 9-10, whose hands are we in?

Very capable hands, I would say. Those same hands who planned the universe, orchestrated the perfect balance of the planets, the chemistry in our air, our water and even in our bodies. The wisdom and knowledge beyond anything we could ever comprehend (Romans 11:33), even planning and preserving the generations of mankind and the birth of Jesus Christ for centuries before it happened. That Birth, I might add, that would never have been necessary if we hadn’t screwed things up by trying to do things our own way, I might add. Those same hands and mind who planned all of that… that’s who’s got us. That’s Who’s in control of our lives.

I don’t know about you, but that’s definitely a comforting thought to me.

Read over the Job passage again, looking especially at verses 13-16.

Q: Is God wise? Write your answer in a full sentence. (verse 13)

That may seem like a silly question, but isn’t that the very truth we question when we question His will? When we question the way our lives are playing out, and when we question the situation we find ourselves in?
So I ask again, is God wise? Do you truly believe that? As we’ve mentioned before, trusting can be very difficult, especially when we can’t see the bigger picture.

But He is no less in control when we’re at the bottom of the hill looking up than when we’ve reached the top and can see the beautiful vista. He was wise, understanding, and in control of it all every step of the way.

Even the difficult ones.

But do you see in verse 13 the second quality that was named?

Q: What characteristic of God was named along with wisdom?

Did you say strength? Might? Power? Depending on your translation, you might have any of those answers. But isn’t it the truth? Along with wisdom, He is strong and powerful. Such a perfect combination. Because without the power to do anything, His wisdom would prove worthless.

In case you take the word lightly, I’d like you to look with me at its Hebrew root, gĕbuwrah: strength, might, valor, bravery, mighty deeds of God; which is from gibbowr, a stronger form of gabar: to be strong and mighty; to prevail. source

So, in my estimation, pretty much the strongest this word could get. And we have that power to help us along the way. So, no, you don't have to always be strong in and of yourself - you've got God on your side!

As children of God, when we question His plan I believe that’s Satan trying to mislead us. Wouldn’t that make sense?

But take heart, and read Job 12:16.

Job 12:16 “With Him are strength and prudence.The deceived and the deceiver are His.” NKJV emphasis mine

So even the Deceiver belongs to God, and must answer to Him. (Like we read a few sessions back)

Now that we know where the doubt is coming from, let’s analyze our own heart, thoughts and motives.

Please re-read the Romans passage.

Switching mental gears back to where we started this session today, answer the following question.

Q: Do you or have you in the past compared yourself to others and the proverbial greener grass on the other side of the fence?

Q: Or do you have tendency in the other direction – almost getting uppity about God’s plan for you, and how your calling is so much better than someone else’s?

In this passage, we see just a little taste of the bigger picture God sees. He knows we each only can see from our own eyes, from our own perspective. But He gives us this glimpse at the whole puzzle. We, the puzzle pieces, get to look at the front of the box for a moment. God says we each have our own roles. Our own gifts, talents and purpose that He has designed especially for us. And just like pieces of a puzzle, we wouldn’t really fit in any other spot. Not without damaging the bigger picture, and likely damaging ourselves and the surrounding pieces in the long run.

Read verse 10.

Romans 12:10 “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor.” NASB

We are to show preference to the other person – not ourselves – and not vie for position. Let them have their place in the puzzle, and accept our own; where God has placed us. It goes back to trust again.

I’d like to conclude with this thought from verses 6-8. Please re-read those verses again. Repeat is good, don’t you think? I know you’ve just read the same passage multiple times, but for me, it never gets old.

DO: If you write in your Bible, circle or underline the action commands.

Romans 12:6-8 “In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging. If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. And if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly.” NLT emphasis mine

What do you see? I see a body of Christ doing what they should be doing. Living out that plan God has for them. And what more beautiful plan could there be? What more beautiful will of God for your life could you imagine?

Q: Which gift do you best see yourself in?

Q: Do you feel that’s the one God has given you, or is it the one you wish you had?

Q: Do you strive to live out the gift that God has given you? Why or why not?

In your prayer time, spend some time thanking God for your gift(s) – the one(s) he planned and designed especially for you. Pray also for His help to live out the gift(s) the way He intended.

You’re beautiful, sweet sister. And so is your gift.

Acceptance – 8

Accepting God’s plan for our lives is sometimes the hardest thing we would ever do. The hard part might be trusting that the way God has planned your best is the way you would like your life to take shape. Trusting Him. That can be tough.

The flip side of the difficulty comes in letting go. Not able to see the whole way and yet handing over control. All the while maintaining a right attitude toward God.

Tough. But we were never called to go it alone. God promises to be our help. Multiple times in the Bible He promises this – a few of my favorites include Psalm 46:1 and Hebrews 4:16.

Psalm 46:1 “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” NASB

Hebrews 4:16 “So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.” NLT

Please read our text: Romans 12:1-21, 13:1-2, Daniel 2:21, Job 12:9-16

We will go through it bit by bit, and will likely take a few sessions to go over it all.

Let’s zoom in on Romans 12:1.

Romans 12:1 “I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.” NKJV

Don’t you think that’s a great starting point? It gives me shivers a little. But hits home on the basis and foundation of what our attitude should be. A sacrifice. No longer do our ‘rights’ matter; our rights, selfish goals, desires and plans surrendered and no longer our own.

And before you get a little haughty, read the last line of verse 1 again.

It is our reasonable service.

Think of it this way: when you buy a product, let’s just say for our example a coffeemaker. When it does its function – that is, to make coffee – do we offer laud and praise to the coffeemaker? Do we marvel at it for having made our favorite brew? Likely not. Unless you’re just really enthusiastic in the morning, you just expect the coffeemaker to do its job. It is its reasonable service.

Now, don’t get me wrong – we are more highly valued and more dearly loved than the coffeemaker, but do you get the idea?

That. That is reasonable service. To be a living, willing sacrifice; a tool in God’ hands to be used for what He created us for. And He has created you with a specific purpose in mind.

Revelation 4:11 “Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power; for Thou hast created all things, and for Thy pleasure they are, and were created.” KJ21

We were created for His pleasure. For His pleasure! The God of the universe wanted us for His pleasure. And the number one way to please Him is to trust Him.

Hebrews 11:6 “And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him.” NLT

So we’re back at that ol’ ‘trust’ word again. Why does it always come to that? Wouldn’t it be easier if we could just keep control and let God handle bigger matters? See that’s the thing. Those bigger matters all affect God’s precious children, and as His precious children, He wants us to let Him handle everything.

Continue reading in Romans 12, and look at verse 2.

Romans 12:2 “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” NLT

Q: Does God want us to stay the same?

Q: When will we learn to know God’s will for us?

Yes, by turning over control. I never put these two concepts together before! I love it when God reveals truths from His sweet word.

I would like you to look at the text from Romans 13 and from Daniel.

Daniel 2:21 “He controls the course of world events;    he removes kings and sets up other kings.He gives wisdom to the wise    and knowledge to the scholars.” NLT

So, are you like me in the fact that it’s so hard to trust why we live in the time when we’re living sometimes? When it seems like the world leaders, or leaders that are in power over our country were brought to power somehow apart from God’s will? I think things like that make it hard to trust Him sometimes. But these verses are a valuable reminder that you, even in the time you are living, are still in God’s plan. He planned for you to live in the specific time you are living, and He allowed, yes even appointed the current rulers, knowing full well what their actions and decisions would be. This doesn’t make your obedience and trust any less important. In fact, quite the opposite. I believe God would love your trust and obedience, and honor it especially when you don’t understand. Abraham (See Genesis 22 for the full story) trusted God even when it surely broke his heart, and he certainly didn’t understand. And he was called the friend of God.

We will pick up again next time with more on this topic, but for now, I’d like for you to pray and meditate on how surrendered you are to His will. A truly no matter what surrender. If God prompts your heart that you need to surrender more, then ask Him for help. He will help you!

Acceptance - 7

Text: 1 Peter 1: 14-16, 4:7-14

1 Peter 1:15-16 “but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.”” NASB

How does one become accepted by God? Isn’t that the age-old question?

Some ask it again and again in their lifetimes. Maybe you have learned the answer already. Maybe you’ve looked into different solutions yourself?

Here’s one thing I’d like to say. No matter your journey, there’s only one answer. One. Simple, huh?

Jesus.

There you go – mystery solved.

But here’s another question. Once you’re a Christian – you have accepted Jesus – how do we please Him?

It’s one thing to be adopted into His family; have all the “paperwork” done and finalized, but it’s another to have Him, all-holy eternal Creator, perfect God to be pleased with you.

Release that breath you’ve been holding and let’s dig in to what God’s word says. I will preface this by saying that I have by no means got this thing figured out. By no means. And yet, we are here to learn, to shape one another.

Proverbs 27:17 “Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” NASB

And to love each other through the process.

 Proverbs 17:17 “A friend loves at all times,And a brother is born for adversity.” NASB

1 Peter 4:8 “Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins.” NASB

So, together, let’s grow a little today and learn what will please our Abba Father.

Please read our text from 1 Peter 1.

Tall order, huh? Be holy. For me, an American, that’s about as impossible as trying to be Asian, or if someone told me to be 6’ tall, or to be older. There may be a way to fake it, rig it, or become someday, but I can’t just wiggle my nose and “be holy”.

But the blessing is, God knows that. And that’s why we need Christ. And that’s why He provided Christ. Why He gives grace.

Do you see? To be accepted by and to please God is to accept, imitate and strive to be like Him.

The more like Him we are, the more pleasure we bring Him.

Read through 1 Peter 4:7-14. Concentrate on verse 11.

1 Peter 4:11 “Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen.” NLT

Also look at 1 Peter 5:5-6.

In being like Christ, for some reason it’s easy to get the mindset of being somehow better. But look at verse 5, and also James 4:6, which both reference Proverbs 3:34.

1 Peter 5:5 “In the same way, you younger men must accept the authority of the elders. And all of you, serve each other in humility, for“God opposes the proud    but favors the humble.”” NLT

James 4:6 “But he gives us even more grace to stand against such evil desires. As the Scriptures say,“God opposes the proud    but favors the humble.”” NLT

God draws near and gives grace when we are humble.

We will close today with a handful of things for you to ponder and pray about. Use your journal and don’t rush through these questions.

Q: In 1 Peter 4:11 whose words should be coming from our mouths?

Q: In the same verse, whose strength do we rely on to do that?

Q: Do you think that id we are relying on God’s strength to be like God, is there any room whatsoever for our own glory or our own agenda?

Are you worried that you will somehow be unhappy if you surrender your own agendas to God?

DO: Please write out 1 Peter 4:19 and 1 Peter 5:10.

1 Peter 5:10 “In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.” NLT

Acceptance - 6

So you’re not accepted.

You don’t fit in.

Fit in, may I ask, to what? With whom?

How you answer that question may well be the solution to your problem.

You see, when we try to fit in with the world, and continually have to change and adapt, and may I be so bold as to say compromise, we will continually fail, because it is not who God made us to be. Not who God saved us to be.

Please read 1 Peter 3.

I’m going to jump back a few verses and add 1 Peter 2:9

1 Peter 2:9 “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God’s own possession, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” NASB

If we want to be accepted, we ought to pick the One whose acceptance matters most, n'est-ce pas?

And what are our criteria for acceptance?

Q: What do you tend to try or do to attain acceptance?

Q: How’s that working out for you?

I want you to take a look at 1 Peter 3:3-4.

Q: Who ought we be looking to please?

Q: What are His criteria? (see verse 4)

I would bet that His list looks a bit different than our list. We try and do and attempt at anything and everything, because then we can look back and say, “Look at me. Look at what I accomplished, when really, nothing we did caused the all-holy, ever-just God to look on us with mercy. He gave us that mercy, and on top of that, the profound gift of grace. What more could a girl ask for?

To have the world love us, too? Is that it?

We are supposed to shine. Stand out. Why would we want that acceptance? Why would we want that acceptance?

See verse 12 in our text:

1 Peter 3:12 “For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous,And His ears attend to their prayer,But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” NASB

Theorize with me: Would you rather have the world accept you for a time, and continually have to chase it? And be accepted by a world who is going to be separated from our all-holy all-loving God for eternity? OR would you rather have a bit harder time fitting in, but have an eternal God who is all powerful and all-forgiving sweep you off your feet and invite you into His holy Heaven?

We must keep this in mind. Our aim to fit in ought to have nothing to do with this world. In our next session we will look briefly at being accepted by God. Right now, though, I want you to focus on striving to be unaccepted by the world – because if the world is at odds with us, we ought to be glad. Here’s why:

James 4:4 “You adulterers! Don't you realize that friendship with the world makes you an enemy of God? I say it again: If you want to be a friend of the world, you make yourself an enemy of God.” NLT

Romans 8:7 “For the sinful nature is always hostile to God. It never did obey God's laws, and it never will.” NLT

Our steadfast focus should be on Christ. Convinced, sure, certain, solid:

2 Timothy 1:11-12 “And of this gospel I was appointed a herald and an apostle and a teacher.  That is why I am suffering as I am. Yet this is no cause for shame, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him until that day.” NIV emphasis mine

Any hatred toward you for being a Christian, for living like Christ, for being different, standing out (or sticking out), is not truly directed toward you.

John 15:18-21 “If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, because of this the world hates you. Remember the word that I said to you, ‘A slave is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you; if they kept My word, they will keep yours also. But all these things they will do to you for My name’s sake, because they do not know the One who sent Me.” NASB

Q: Why does the world hate you, according to verse 21?

Q: If you are hated, then, what should be our desire for that person?

Should we get angry or hurt when someone doesn’t accept us? Someone who is not a child of God?

I argue that we shouldn’t. Here’s why. Because our greatest emotion in that moment ought to be compassion for their souls- because they are not headed for an eternity in Heaven.

Pray this week for God to help turn your hurt into compassion – a desire for them to know our God. More than likely, you will not be feeling it. Often when I don’t feel it, I ask God to help me use His love for them until I feel it myself. Be a channel for His mercy love and compassion toward His precious creation. In this way, we focus less on our own rejection, less on our own hurts, and turn our hearts outward. And I believe that’s just what God wants from us.

Acceptance – 5

Text: Job 1:6-12, Isaiah 40:15, Psalm 27:10

When you’re not accepted by the ones who should accept you… this can be the most difficult of all, both to process, heal and learn to deal with. Sometimes the person who should be accepted is someone who you will be ‘stuck with’ for lack of a better way to say it. Family, for example.

Anybody relating to that?

I have someone like that in my life. And you know, even though it feels awful, God’s still in control of the situation, and it never happens without His knowledge or, yes, even His permission.

Read Job 1:6-12 and answer these questions:

Q: In verse 12, God grants permission. Who does He allow to do what?

Q: Because God is unchanging, the way He operated in Job’s time would be the same as the way He operates now. What does this mean about the things that happen in your life? (Including the things that seemingly ‘go wrong’ in your life.) Thoughtfully write the answer in your journal, and consider sharing here in our community, in the comments section or on our Facebook page.

Q: According to this passage, who does Satan have to answer to? (see verse 7)

In verse 11, Satan makes a suggestion to God:

Job 1:11 “But put forth Your hand now and touch all that he has; he will surely curse You to Your face.”” NASB

The root word for touch in the Hebrew is naga`, and it not only means to touch – it also means ‘to strike’. I believe this is a better picture of what Satan is demanding. Can you imagine, Satan who absolutely hates God, and anyone who would please Him… Really Satan hates anyone other than himself. You and I included. And there he is, answering to God about what he’s been up to, and then begs God to destroy all the blessings He’s giving him.

Does it ever feel like Satan’s up there making that same request toward you? It’s so possible that’s what’s going on. But look at the root reason he has for destroying peoples’ lives – see verse 11 again.

Q: What is the ultimate goal Satan has when he craves our demise?

Now that we’ve got all that foundation laid, I’d like you to continue with me on our next text. Please read Isaiah 49:15 and Psalm 27:10. Since they’re short, I’ve included them here.

Isaiah 49:15 “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.” KJV

Psalms 27:10 “When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.” KJV

In Psalm 27:10, the phrase ‘take me up’ is from the Hebrew acaph, and it carries the idea of gathering together, as a bird would gather her young, or see you it is used in Judges 20:11.

Judges 20:11 “So all the men of Israel were gathered against the city, knit together as one man.” KJV

And this is how God says He will take us up. Gathered. Knit together with God. He’s going to make sure nothing rips His child away.

Romans 8:38-39 “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” NASB

So in those two verses (Isaiah and Psalms) I find such comfort. They both depict the times when the ones who should be accepting us decide for whatever reason to reject us. But neither verse ends with that hopeless conclusion.

Q: In Isaiah 49:15, it says that a mother may forget/forsake her nursing baby. Who will never forget us? Please write your answer as a complete sentence.

Q: At what point is this believer most drawn to the Lord?

I believe, if we believe that God allows rejection for a reason, that could likely always be the reason. That He wants our love and dependence so badly that He would do/allow whatever it takes to get us and our stubborn hearts to that point.

DO: Please write out the last part of those two verses. Do it more than once if you have to. If it is more applicable to you, go ahead and write out the entire verse.

Please understand how greatly God loves you, and how greatly He craves you! If He sees you content, and decides to allow Satan to rip away that which you hold dear, He allows it for a good reason. He allows it so that you will be drawn to further depend on Him, and glorify Him through it. Glorify Him through, in, because, and in spite of. And what greater glory it will be when that praise was born of tough times!

So, by all we know to be true, those in our lives that should accept us (this could be anyone – spouse, father, mother, siblings, church friends, etc.) might reject us because God has a work to do in us!  Is God working in your life in this area today?

Please recognize it as such – lessons more quickly learned often hurt less. Just start leaning on God more – through the hurt, because of the hurt, or even before you get hurt.

He loves you and can’t get enough of you.

Acceptance - 4 Dealing with Rejection

Romans 8:1 “Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” NASB

It’s bound to happen. If it hasn’t plagued you for a portion or all of your life already, trust me, it will happen sooner or later. Someone is going to reject you.

There are a variety of grounds they may choose to reject you on – anything from your faith, your personality, something that transpired between you, or for no seeming reason whatsoever. It’s going to happen.

Please read our texts: Romans 8:1-18, John 15:18-21, John 16:32-33 These are going to be our base texts for the next couple sessions, so you might want to find a bookmark.

Rejection hurts. There’s no way around that. It just really hurts.

Q: In your journal, please list some people who have rejected you. Do your best to contain your emotions for now. Let’s look at this as objectively as we can; we’ll deal with emotions in a minute.

DO: Now take your list, and categorize those people (as best as you can, for only our Heavenly Father truly knows the hearts of them) into two categories: believers and non-believers.

Though rejection from both categories certainly hurts, I can tell you that for me personally, rejection by other believers is far harder to deal with. Over the next couple days we are going to look at both. In some ways we deal with them the very same way. But there can be a bit different approach between them at times too.

I’d love for you to realize one very important thing.

Jesus suffered rejection every bit as much as you, and then some. And He remained sinless through it all.

Hebrews 4:15 “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.” NIV

I find it interesting that in NASB the word for empathize is written as sympathize. The meaning is rather a dual one; the Greek word is sympatheō, and it carries meaning of both sympathy and compassion. The King James Version uses the word “touched” (source). In any and all of these, we know the very important truth that Christ also suffered like us, and He is understanding, compassionate and sympathetic toward our situation. He does know what you’re going through. It would be immature and childlike for us to declare to Him “you don’t understand” or “nobody understands me”. He does. Completely.

Please look again at our text in John 16, specifically verse 33:

John 16:33 “These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.” NASB

We are promised trouble. This life was never meant to be easy. Christ knew the pain we would face, and that’s part of why He came here to overcome it. To conquer it on our behalf.

So how do we handle it when a believer rejects us? This person is supposed to be on our side, are they not? Yes. And they are, technically speaking. They just may not be doing what they should be doing.

What? May not be? How about ‘they are certainly in the wrong’! I am hurt here, and they are to blame!

Did I catch you? Is that what you’re thinking? I would be if I was you.
But here’s why I can’t draw a blanket conclusion that they are in the wrong. Sometimes, I believe God moves people apart for a very specific reason. If both parties are Christians, then I’d say the odds are even more in favor of this. Here’s why. God’s ways are not our ways, and His thoughts are not our thoughts. He alone can see the bigger picture. He alone knows the steps that must be taken to shape and mold His children in the best way possible. If that means separating two of His children for a period of time, then that’s the way it must be.

Are any of you parents? You know, then, certainly, that at times you need to intervene and separate your children – for their good. Is this making any better sense when I put it that way? Can you relate?

At other times, when you are rejected by another Christian, it may be that they are not walking in obedience to God. They, just like anyone, yourself included, are still human. They are still capable of failing. I’m not here to excuse anyone, believe me. I am here, though, to let you know that you’re not responsible for them. You’re just simply not. You are responsible for you, and nobody else.

Romans 14:12 “So then each one of us will give an account of himself to God.” NASB emphasis mine

Look again at Hebrews 4:15. Check out behind the scenes on the word tempted:

peirazōto try, make trial of, test: for the purpose of ascertaining his quality, or what he thinks, or how he will behave himselfto test one maliciously, craftily to put to the proof his feelings or judgmentsinflict evils upon one in order to prove his character and the steadfastness of his faithsource 

Sometimes, as hard as it is to swallow, God may be allowing rejection in your life so that your faith is strengthened. So that you learn that He alone is your constant. He alone is the one who you should put your faith and confidence in.

Psalm 71:1 “In You, O Lord, I put my trust; Let me never be put to shame.” NKJV

Romans 8:18 “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” NASB

I’d like for you to look again at our text in John 15 before we close. I have two admonitions for you.

1) Don’t take it personal.

In verse 18, Jesus says any rejection you receive is actually directed at Him. You are His child.

Romans 8:16-17 “The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, heirs also, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him so that we may also be glorified with Him.” NASB

Which brings me to my second admonition:

2) Remember He will help you through it.

Every day might be a struggle. It may not become resolved this side of Heaven. But know that He’s got your back. And your heart. And He’s sent you help. See John 15:26. That Helper is referred to in other passages as our Comforter. And in this case, they’re One in the same.

In your prayer time, ask for that help. Now’s the time to unleash your emotions – tell it all to Him, He can handle it, and it brings Him such joy to hear you tell it to him, even if it brings searing pain or rips open a wound you were trying to ignore. Have God help you through it. He’s no stranger to rejection, and he does know what you’re going through. He’s been there. 

Acceptance – 3

Text: Romans 12:9-21, Psalm 34:13-15, Romans 14:19

Last session we talked about acceptance as in “not judging”, or, the absence of a negative behavior. Today, Id like for us to look at constructively and consciously “accepting” others. In other words, positive action.

We’re still in Romans today, but we’ll be a page or two farther back. Please read Romans 12:9-10.

If you read it in the King James Version, you would have encountered the word dissimulation, which means hypocrisy.

In other words, don’t just pretend to love your neighbor… actually do it! Put the others’ needs and desires ahead of your own (vs 10).

Psalm 34:14 “Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it.” NLT

Actively seek peace in your relationships.  Sometimes it may take some doing, but when we seek the Lord, and put others first, this will come a whole lot easier. See in the next verse how following Christ’s example teaches us how to be sensitive of others?

Q: In Psalm 34:15 & 17, how does the Lord respond when we cry out?

Q: In Psalm 34:15, is God sensitive to the needs of others who are below Him?

Read 1 Timothy 1:5.

Q: In 1 Timothy 1:5, what type of heart are we to love with?

How can we achieve love from a pure heart toward people we would really rather steer clear of?

Christ.

The only ever answer to that is Christ. Remember what He says in Matthew 19:26:

Matthew 19:26 “But Jesus looked at them and said to them, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” NKJV

He will give you the strength and opportunity to love up on those people. He wants us to accept, and in doing so, to love others. Jump back a few verses to Matthew 19:19.

Q: How much are we to love others?

As much as we love ourselves.

If you’re like most, that’s an awful lot.

And it can be really hard to love some people sometimes. Isn’t it interesting that it is sometimes harder to accept people who hurt us, even though Christ – who was hurt by them even more badly – readily accepts, even before they ask? (Romans 5:8)

Baby steps. Prayer and baby steps out of the norm.

So what are some steps to take in the process?

We’ve already looked at some in the past few sessions. One of the baby steps toward actively reaching out and accepting others is forgiving them. Whether or not they ask. That is a big way to reach out.

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you." NASB

And then, back in Romans 14 again – read verse 19:

Romans 14:19 “So then, let us aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up.” NLT

I see two steps here, do you?

Q: What are the two steps?

Seek peace.

Edify one another.

Seek peace! Or, in the KJV, “follow after the things which make for peace.”

Build them up! Edify one another.

Note: this is not the same word as 1 Thessalonians 5:11 ‘edify’ which means to build. This edify means foundation; confirmation.

DO: Think and pray about what ‘seeking peace’ might look like for you. Write down some possibilities.

DO: Right below that, make a list of ways to edify them.

You may find, as I did, that the first list led to the other, and they sortof morphed in the middle.

Let’s take a moment to look through some other verses on the matter.

Ephesians 4:12-13, 29 “Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ. This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ… Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.’” NLT

2 Corinthians 12:19b “…We speak before God in Christ. But we do all things, beloved, for your edification.” NKJV

Romans 12:18 “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.” NASB

Romans 15:2 “Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification.” NASB

If you haven’t already, please read the remainder of our text from Romans: Romans 12:9-21.

This is what your list should be looking like – your list on how to edify. Did you have to add to yours a little? I did. From Romans 12, especially.

Let all things be done for edifying.

Pray.

Bless them.

Rejoice with them.

Be humble.

Don’t seek revenge.

Seek peace (there it is again!)

Feed.

Give drink.

Be overcome with good.

And lastly, because it sums it up so well, look at Ephesians 4:29, 4:12-13.

Speak good. Speak grace.

Edify until there is true unity and harmony among you.

Until you measure up to Christ.

Acceptance - 2

Open your Bible back up to Romans. This is such a rich book; I love it. Paul speaks with such no-nonsense instruction, yet with a note of understanding as a fellow Christian – a fellow human.

Today we look at Romans 14:1-12, 5:1-13

Romans 14:8-9 “If we live, it’s to honor the Lord. And if we die, it’s to honor the Lord. So whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. 9 Christ died and rose again for this very purpose—to be Lord both of the living and of the dead.” NLT

Romans 14:1 “Accept other believers who are weak in faith, and don’t argue with them about what they think is right or wrong.” NLT

Welcome and accept those who are weaker than others. Do not just write them off as less than yourself. We are on the same side and it is not our own side. I ask, along with Paul:

Romans 14:10a “So why do you condemn another believer? Why do you look down on another believer?...”

Why do you, human, redeemed you, pass judgment on your brother?

All of us, pilgrims on this journey, are fallen, and did not have the strength to pick ourselves up – why then do we who were lifted, feel we have the right to sneer? To boast? To judge?

We are here, we were redeemed – all for one reason.

Q: What was that reason, according to 14:11, 15:6, 9-11?

To glorify who?

Nor ourselves, certainly.

God! To give glory to God!

And why then do we vie for higher levels among one another? I submit that the higher we try to raise ourselves, the less glory we give God, and the less we fulfill our given purpose.

Matthew 19:30 “But many who are the greatest now will be least important then, and those who seem least important now will be the greatest then.” NLT

We nit-pick and sneer over trivial things, hurting each other, breaking God’s heart and missing the point.

Q: Be honest. Is there someone you look down on, or have trouble accepting? (Not including names here, publicly. That’s for your personal journal only.)

Q: Look at why that is. It is probably different for each person on your list. Mine looks a bit like this:

She hurt me.

Poor people skills

I don’t agree with her theology

She hurt someone I care about

Immature

Now take a look at Romans 14:4

Romans 14:4 “Who are you to condemn someone else’s servants? Their own master will judge whether they stand or fall. And with the Lord’s help, they will stand and receive his approval.” NLT

Can we lay aside our victim-mentality for a moment and look at those people on our list as children of our God? Someone for whom Christ died (verse 15), who share our Abba Father?

Repeat after me: “It’s not about me.”

Write it in big letters in your journal if that helps.

Read verses 7-9. We are here not for ourselves, but for Christ, and His work. And we can do that because Christ died and rose again for that to happen. Look with me at the Greek roots of Lord in verses 8-9.

Whether we live or die (or get hurt or offended, yes?) we are God’s. For this reason Christ came that He might be Lord of us.

Verse 8 Lord = God (Greek word kyrios: he to whom a person or thing belongs, the possessor and disposer of a thing)source

Verse 9 Lord = to be lord of(Greek word kyrieuō: to be lord of, to rule, have dominion over; to exercise influence upon, to have power over)source

Do you see the difference? He is to be the lord of our lives – the center of our focus, not ourselves.

So when we put Him at the center, and ourselves as merely one more arrow pointing to Him, it doesn’t matter so much now what the other arrows are doing. Are you following me?

And if those other arrows are doing something that hurts you, or that you don’t agree with, let God take care of it, okay?

DO: Write out Romans 14:12.

Romans 14:12-13 “So then each one of us will give an account of himself to God. Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this—not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother’s way.” NASB

Let’s aim for harmony and stop picking at one another (Romans 14:19). Don’t tear apart God’s work over these things. You are responsible for you. You were commanded (Romans 15:7) to accept one another. Anything less is sin.

We ought to get off our own high horse and view ourselves as Christ did: as a servant. One not concerned over insults and injuries to ourselves, but focusing on our central focus – God.

Romans 15:3 “For even Christ did not please Himself; but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached You fell on Me.” NASB

DO: Today, take the list you made and spend some time in prayer over your relationships with each one of those people; handing your hurts over to God, because ultimately they were directed at Him anyway (Romans 15:3).

1 Peter 5:7 “Casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.” NKJV

Ask God to help I healing and viewing His children as He views them. As people who He died for.

Acceptance - 1

Romans 15:7 “Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.” NIV

Sometimes it seems intangible. Sometimes it seems alluring. Some spend their lives fighting for it. Some are blessed to have always known it.

Acceptance.

In this segment we will be looking at different facets of acceptance: toward others, others’ acceptance of us (or lack of it), acceptance by God, acceptance of God, and acceptance of His plan and will for us.

I would like for you to spend some time in prayer, asking God to open your mind to areas in your life that need sharpened, matured, mended or healed. Maybe they’re hidden; maybe they are obvious, bleeding, raw. Maybe there are some from both categories.

Please read our text Romans 15:1-13 and let’s dig in.

Zoom in on verses 2-3:

Romans 15:2-3 “Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, leading to edification. 3 For even Christ did not please Himself; but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached You fell on Me.” NKJV

Christ took all our reproaches – the ones we lash on each other, the ones we earned when we sinned and acted apart from God’s commandment, causing our rejection and lack of Holy acceptance – that is, without intervention.

Read Psalm 69:9-12

And He knew this was coming because of us, and loved, gave, died anyway.

Psalm 69:11 “I wore sackcloth as my clothing,and I was a joke to them.” HCSB

Q:  From Psalm 69:11-12 Christ humbled Himself for us, and how did we respond?

Sheer ridicule.

How could we? How dare we?

And we who did this to Him – yes, willingly – He accepts us. Chose us. Loves us.

What I’d love for you to notice in this is that He is our example.

1 John 2:6 “Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did.” NIV

 1 Peter 2:21 “For you were called to this,because Christ also suffered for you,leaving you an example,so that you should follow in His steps.” HCSB emphasis mine

Ephesians 5:1-2 “Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma.” NKJV

Philippians 2:5 “Make your own attitude that of Christ Jesus” HCSB

I would like to encourage you this: there has never been or ever will be any hurt greater than that which Christ took because of us. And we have His example to follow – so it is time to lay aside our pride and realize that even if we’ve been hurt, we too can forgive, as Christ forgave us.

Ephesians 4:32 “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” NKJV

Only after that forgiveness and by following His example of pure grace can we even begin to practice acceptance toward one another. Even toward those who do not accept us.

Turn back to our text in Romans 15.

Romans 15:1 “We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves.” NIV

And we are commanded to accept one another.

Romans 15:7 “Therefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted [a]us to the glory of God.”  NASB

Only through God will we ever be able to do this.

Whenever we see a ‘therefore’ in a text, we ought to look at the preceding verses. So glance back at verses 5-6.

Romans 15:5 “Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus,” NASB

The ESB says it this way “May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus.”

And here’s why:

Romans 15:6 “so that with one mind and one voice you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.” NIV

It brings Him glory. This. This is how He wants His children to behave. This is how He wants His ambassadors and representatives to act.

DO: In your journal, take the time to write out Romans 15:5-7. I believe there is such value in physically writing it out.

DO: Now take a highlighter or a different color pen and highlight important words – such as God’s character (we are, after all, to follow His example) and our commands.

Q: What were the characteristics you pulled out?

Q: Do you believe that the characteristics you underlined or circled in verse 5 give us a clue as to how to live in harmony? Why or why not?

Do not be discouraged. Be encouraged. God will enable you to act as He desires. Surrender to His control and enjoy the harmony He brings.